Oh my. I just bought an app that has this as a key part of its App Store description:
Sure, there ‘s plenty of entertainment apps out there and you might think: ‘iLIkeCereal!!? Why should I want that? I ‘ve already had an iBeer for breakfast anyways!!!!!11111 ‘ Well, here ‘s why: Because it ‘s awesome, delicious, and an essential part of a complete breakfast “ besides, it ‘s a bit too early to be drinking, now isn ‘t it"?
I swear to you guys, I ‘m not typically on the lookout for great cereal apps, or any apps relating to any breakfast staples “ but the press release I got from the developers of this app had me genuinely laughing out loud, many times over. That is just about a first. It cracked me up enough to say ‘hell, I ‘m gonna give that cereal app a look ‘. That sounds crazy right? Read on for some of the classic lines contained in the release “ it ‘s good stuff
Here ‘s the release ‘s opening headline and sub-head:
iLikeCereal!! HOBBLES ONTO iPHONE APP STORE
Fun Entertainment App Sells Not-so-Epic 26 Copies
Some background on the app itself:
iLikeCereal!!, a milk and cereal physics sim, unashamedly born out of fellow iPhone app Koi Pond’s success, but yet still lovingly crafted and uniqueified and innovateded by its creators (it’s got sweet music, too), just didn’t quite take the App Store charts by storm.
Just reading ‘a milk and cereal physics sim ‘ cracks me up “ the use of ‘uniqueified ‘ and ‘innovateded ‘ is just icing on the cereal.
Some words on the app ‘s international success:
With full French, German, Italian, Spanish, and Japanese (don’t forget Croatian) localizations, Marroni and Galic found it especially awesome that not a single Spaniard or Nihonjin deigned to partake in the breakfast cereal shenanigans.
‘We know that cereal’s not the biggest thing outside North America, but it’s almost like people haven’t even heard of breakfast in some parts of the world, ‘ said Marroni, in between bites of some delicious and sugary sweet Choco Bombs.
I love this bit of background on the team behind the app:
Beginning life as a work-for-hire project in the heydays of early 2009, and eventually being amicably dumped by the original publisher and turning into a work-for-nothing project just a few short days ago, iLikeCereal!! has a long and storied history.
A mention of the app ‘s UI:
‘Anyway we spent four months, on-and-off, on what was supposed to be a four week project and packed it with a lot of cool features and polish–except for the UI; that really ain’t pretty, but hey, that stuff costs money, man, and artists don’t work for free, ‘ said Galic.
Ah yes, and some insight on the App Store approval process:
‘It was approved quick enough, ‘ said Galic. ‘Though, it wasn’t until a day after we’d got approval to go on sale and realized that, since we didn’t launch at the exact nanosecond that we received approval from Apple, we’d be buried a day down the new releases list (out of sight of most any customers), that we started to get an inkling of the App Store’s real majesty. ‘
The devs ‘ hopes and dreams for the app and their own success:
It was during this heady 24 hours or so at the top of the new releases list that the pair begin to let their heads fill with ridiculous fantasies of actually being able to make a living at independent development.
‘I was going to to pay the rent and get something to eat, ‘ said Galic. ‘I’m actually pretty hungry, right now. ‘
And the actual lack of success, and its consequences for a pair of independent devs:
After calculating that the royalties they earned would be enough for only the cheapest and most vile of malt liquors and Marroni’s girlfriend saying that he’d have to sell at least 30 copies before she’d let him touch her again, the devastation fully sank in.
Their plucky fighting spirit and plans for the app ‘s future:
‘We really have a lot of cool ideas for updates to iLikeCereal!! too, ‘ said Marroni. ‘Think RPG. Think iLikeCereal!! RPG. ‘
And an honest look inward and where they may have gone wrong so far:
‘We blame pirates, ‘ the pair said, in eerie unison. ‘Dirty, filthy pirates. ‘
Seriously “ I get quite a few press releases each day. Many of them are quite good, some are boring, some tout exciting new apps “ but none have made me laugh this hard. Or inspired me to buy a cereal app. An app with a setting for ‘Milk Viscosity ‘ in it.
Oh, what ‘s the app like you might ask. It ‘s about like you ‘d expect from a milk and cereal physics sim. I ‘m happy with it.
Good job Press Release Lads (and/or Ladettes) “ not often I can say reading a press release is one of the highlights of a day. 🙂
If you ‘re in need of a good milk and cereal physics app, check out iLikeCereal in the App Store now “ it ‘s priced at $1.99.
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